Will-O'-The-Wisp: i'm 5 years old! XD

You know when your birthday is, but how old should you really be?
(just put an x on the things you do)

[ ] I know how to make a pot of coffee. (i dont like coffee)
[ ] I can cook for myself. (i will. as soon as go to university)
[ ] I think politics are exciting.
[ ] My parents have better things to say than my friends.
So far: 0

[ ] I show up for school/college/work
every day early. (naaah.. i have my name jotted down everyday)
[ ] I always carry a pen/pencil in my
pocket/purse. (who does anyway?)
[ ] I've never gotten a detention
[x] I've watched talk shows.
[ ] i know what 'credibility' means without looking it up. (my english isnt that good, okay?)
[ ] drink coffee at least once a week. (again.. i hate coffee. except for mocha.. they are to die for!)
So Far: 1

[x] I know how to do the dishes.
[ ] I can count to 10 in Japanese.
[ ] When I say I'm going to do something I do it.
[ ] My parents trust me.
[ ] I can mow the lawn
[ ] I can make adults laugh without being stupid.
[ ] I remember to water my plants.
[ ] I study when I have to.
[ ] I pay attention at school/college.
[ ] I remember to feed my pets.
so far: 1

[ ] I can spell 'experience' without looking it up (i'm bad at spelling's okay?)
[ ] I clean up my own mess.
[ ] The first thing I do when I wake up is get caffeine.
[ ] I can go to the store without getting something I don't need.
[x] I understand jokes the first time they are said.
[x] I can type quickly.
So far: 2

[ ] I have realized that the weather forecast changes every hour.
[ ] I have realized that no one will take you seriously unless you are over the age of 25 and have a job.
[x] I can read a book and actually finish it.
So Far: 1

(now add them all up)

= 5.. see? i'm smart! i'm a 5 years old kid who goes to a high school when the other 5 years old kids are learning how to minus 5 from 3 in their rainbow painted wall classroom.. using their fingers!! XD